


Back To December

by dreamnjm



Series: Rekkaps Stories [1]
Category: League of Legends RPF
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Daddy Kink, Dirty Talk, Getting Back Together, M/M, Swearing, crackheads g2, it's fluff at the end trust me, just pain, martin is too cocky sometimes, mentioned past perkz/caps, mentions of smoking and drinking, no smut i'm sorry, rasmus is dumb, wunder is done with the couples
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-01
Updated: 2021-03-01
Packaged: 2021-03-14 00:12:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,486
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29784216
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dreamnjm/pseuds/dreamnjm
Summary: It’s been 2 years since they last played together and now that rekkles joins g2, they have to start working with each other again. Were 2 years enough to heal both of them from their sudden break up or is it still too fresh?
Relationships: Marcin "Jankos" Jankowski/Mihael "Mikyx" Mehle, Martin "Rekkles" Larsson/Rasmus "Caps" Winther
Series: Rekkaps Stories [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2189205
Comments: 8
Kudos: 23





	Back To December

**Author's Note:**

> So, hello, it's the first work in my entire life and it just happened to be rekkaps. Firstly i want to say that english isn't my first language, so there might be some mistakes, i'm sorry in advance. Also, i want to say BIG thank you to all of my wonderful friends who supported me and my writing, i love yall so much, it couldn't be done without you <3 i hope you will enjoy it and see you soon,
> 
> Justyna <3
> 
> Inspired by Taylor's song "Back To December"

november 2020

_ “he is what?!” caps almost shouted, not wanting to believe what he had just heard _

_ “rasmus, please calm down” carlos tried his best to calm down the poor boy “i know your past with him is difficult, but it’s our best chance to win worlds if we sign him” _

_ “but carlos, it’s not going to work out between us, i-i can’t just suddenly face him and say “hi martin, yeah we broke up, but i’m glad to see you and i can’t wait to be your teammate again!” it’s fucking crazy and you know it!” at this point he was so close to ending the video call, but he knew that it would get him into more trouble. so instead he tried to collect his thoughts and calm down, however it only made his state worse _

_ “listen, i really understand where you are coming from, i’m just saying that he’s the best option to replace luka and you know that. besides, if he accepts the offer, nothing can be done. i’m really sorry rasmus, but i wanted to personally tell you this ahead of time” his boss concluded and he knew that the older man cared about his feelings, he greatly appreciated the fact that he had wanted to tell him everything in person, but caps still felt uneasy about the whole situation _

_ “okay, i will try, but i can’t promise anything” he sighed, it was almost sure, wasn’t it? _

_ “thank you, have a good night rasmus”  _

_ “you too boss” caps ended the call as quickly as he could and layed down on his bed thinking  _

_ “how am i gonna even survive this?” _

january 2021

it has been more than a month since rekkles officially joined g2 and if rasmus was honest, it turned out to be more stressful than he had imagined. sure, they scrimed a lot and tried to make it work, but everyone could sense the tense atmosphere between the mid laner and adc. 

today was a big day, it was january 2nd, so it meant that the whole team had to go back to berlin and move into their new gaming house before the split starts. danish boy was first to arrive at their new house, so he had some time to wander around the place. he noticed that their bedrooms only had a bed and a nightstand 

_ “i guess we will have to decorate it sometime soon, at least this will occupy me so i don’t think about him”  _ rasmus thought to himself. 

he got so lost with his thoughts that he didn’t notice the door opening. still clueless to what has happened, he went back to the living room, but on his way when he was about to take a turn, his vision suddenly went black and when he expected to fall on the floor, two arms held him in place so strongly that he could swear he recognised who is the person that saved him from falling 

“wow there, you should be more careful, i see you still haven’t changed rasmus” hearing that voice made his heart go faster, he didn’t expect to see him this early and especially not like that

“c-can you let me go now? i need to unpack my suitcase” that was clearly a lie, but he couldn’t stand being with him alone after 2 years

martin just looked at him and when rasmus by accident looked up and saw his ex lover’s eyes, he could see the look that reminded him of their relationship. it was so strange to see, wasn’t he angry at him? they separated on really bad terms, so he expected rekkles to still be quite mad. then why did he see adoration and care in his eyes? all of a sudden martin started to lean towards rasmus and when he was close enough to his lips to kiss him, rasmus closed his eyes and waited for it to happen, but it never did. confused by zero action he decided to open the eyes and saw martin right in front of him smirking at his reaction

“someone got excited i see” rasmus blushed at his words, he couldn’t say anything, he was 

too embarrassed to even mutter a single word

“please, just let me go” seeing his desperation, martin loosened his embrace enough for the younger one to escape to his room. the swede sighed and went to the kitchen to grab a glass of cold water to cool him down after that bizarre encounter.

“ _ i still care about you rasmus, please let me into your heart so i can make you feel loved again” _

_ And I think about summer, all the beautiful times, _

_ I watched you laughing from the passenger side. _

_ And realized I loved you in the fall. _

all of the boys arrived yesterday and they already had dinner together, but because of the compulsory quarantine, the meal wasn’t the best, but hey, it still was something, right?

of course the tension between two ex fnatic members didn’t disappear, which made the rest uncomfortable. no one dared to speak about it, knowing that these two had to solve their shit together before the start of lec.

martin tried to catch rasmus and talk to him, but he avoided him at all costs. they lived in the same house, how was it possible? no matter what, the younger boy always found some excuses

“ _ i have to talk to my parents” _

_ “i need to take care of some stuff in the city” _

and so on, martin started to get frustrated, he knew that was bad, but he just couldn’t handle it. finally one day he had enough and when rasmus was about to say another excuse, the taller boy grabbed his arms and took him to the bathroom, locking the door instantly. to say that rasmus was shocked was an understatement, poor boy had no idea what had just happened, so he looked at martin, waiting for an answer. however, the latter wasn’t even looking at him.

“m-martin? what is going on? i need to do something important right now!” hearing that made him eventually reply

“can you just stop avoiding me? i know, we broke up and it was bad for both of us, but can we talk it out? lec is coming up in a week and we’re doing a shitty job during scrimms and you’re perfectly aware as well”

“i’m not avoidi-”

“you are! god damnit rasmus, can you drop the act? i thought you at least grew up during those 2 years, but i guess i was wrong"

"and so what if i AM avoiding u?! you think it's easy for me? i never expected to see u again and here we are!" 

martin was speechless, the way rasmus responded made him sick, did he really mean that? yes, the end of their relationship wasn't great, but that didn't mean they couldn't talk it out for the sake of the team and spring split.

"quite funny that I'm the one to try and fix this when YOU left me in 2018 without even telling me in advance rasmus" 

"martin, i'm sorry, i didn't mean-"

"whatever, i guess it was a waste of time trying to talk to you, nothing changed"

rasmus knew he fucked up and deserved it but still, those words pierced his heart even more. unable to say anything, he looked at the bathroom floor and heard the click of the door unlocking, the swede left him.

just like rasmus did 2 years ago.

_ And then the cold came, the dark days when fear crept into my mind _

_ You gave me all your love and all I gave you was "Goodbye". _

it was 2 days before the start of lec spring split 2021 and the situation was even worse after the bathroom accident, both of them running it down during the scrims too often, the communication between them was non existent. it of course had an influence on the rest of the team, everyone became so stressed and a normal conversation outside the practice was something unusual. the synergy wasn’t there, none of the members spent the time together, maybe expect miky and jankos, who knows what they were up to, nonetheless the g2 gaming house was too quiet, it seemed like nobody lived there. 

rasmus was going to the kitchen to grab some orange juice, however, on his way there he noticed that the door to martin's bedroom were open. 

_ "why didn't he close them? he always does it, privacy is his priority in the gaming house. what is he- why do i think about that? i don't care what he does, it's none of my business"  _ shaking his head he continued to walk to the kitchen, but the thought still bothered him, he knew something wasn't right. his curiosity took over him and he peeked inside martin’s room, the smell coming from there reminded him of something, at first he couldn’t really comprehend, then it hit him - cigarette. martin returned to his unhealthy habit, how bad had it been for him to get back to smoking? why would he do this again? 

he finally entered the room, but his eyes couldn't find the person he was looking for. it was so dark inside, however turning the lights on was a bad idea, rekkles would immediately find out he was there, so instead he went further into the room as quietly as he could. the closer he got to the balcony, the more visible martin was becoming. moonlight shined on his posture, making him look like a god with those tattoos, leaning over the railing with a cigarette in his hand. his beautiful back muscles highlighted by that natural light, red lips and the smoke coming from between them. how sinful he looked right there, so fucking handsome, even more than ever before. caps gulped at this sight, trying to keep calm, sadly to no use, he could feel his body getting hotter and hotter. what he certainly didn’t expect, was the swede turning around and spotting him in his room. at first he was shocked, but when he saw rasmus got a little bit excited down there, he smirked at him.

“oh, who do we have here? coming into my room and looking at me with those dirty thoughts”

“i don’t have dir-”

“just shut up, don’t even lie to me, if you didn’t, then why i can see you’re fully hard? i think you didn’t learn rasmus”

martiin started to come closer to him, which made the latter take everytime a step back, until his back met with the wall, he was trapped and fucked for sure now. he could feel his erection very well, the embarrassment sinking deeply, his head hung low, unable to look up. 

“aw, someone got embarrassed, how cute” the taller one cooed

“s-shut up, let me go now”

“and why would i do that? tell me”

“...”

“no excuses this time? interesting, maybe you can still surprise me after all. however, the question is, are u still that kinky little boy? if i remember correctly, these type of situations happened pretty damn often in fnc house right?” oh god, rasmus didn’t expect those questions after 2 years, not right now, he had a boner, how could he answer? instead he stayed silent, ignoring what martin had said to him, but like always, disrespecting the older one is a bad decision, he was perfectly aware of it.

“cat got your tongue? should i do something to make u talk? what do u think? were u a good boy to deserve this?”

rasmus was overwhelmed with the way martin spoke to him, it made his pants feel way to tight, that fucker knew what he was doing and was having fun with the teasing and seeing rasmus squirm at every word. the tension was becoming unbearable for both of them, 2 years apart made them suffer, so why are they like this? they can’t even talk about it or find some peace, it’s like rasmus and martin were magnets, always trying to get back together and be inseparable.

“m-martin i don’t think we shou-”

“shhh, it’s okay sweetheart, remember the old times? how we used to sneak around in the fnc gaming house? no one knew what we did”

“b-but everyone knows here about our past, it’s not that easy”

“oh, so you told everyone the spicy details also? didn’t think you would do this rasmus, very bold of u”

“n-no, i didn’t, they just know about our past relationship, nothing more”

“i guess then you’ll have no objections to this”

before rasmus could think about what martin had said, the latter leaned in and pressed their lips together in a hungry kiss, leaving the danish boy stunned for a second, he didn’t waste the time and kissed back, thinking how badly he missed him (not like he would ever tell him that). time seemed to slow down, their tongues dancing together like it was supposed to be, it felt so perfect in that moment. when they finally broke their kiss, both of them didn’t quite know what to do. rasmus still felt uneasy due to his boner, martin saw that and smirked again

“should i help you with that?”

“i-i... “

“it’s not that hard rasmus, you know the magic words right?”

‘y-yeah…”

“soooo? i’m waiting, we don’t want to waste time, do we rasmus?”

“p-please daddy, please, help me” when martin heard his whining, his self-control he always had suddenly wasn’t there. 

“and why would i help you?”

“i’ve been a good boy daddy, please”

“are u sure? good boys listen and you weren’t listening to me at all”

“please, i will do everything to make you feel good”

“everything?”

“everything, but please, help me”

“go on my bed, strip and lay on your back right now”

caps hurriedly got onto the bed and started taking his clothes off, he could feel martin’s eyes looking at his every movement. the cold bedding against his hot body made rasmus let out a quiet (or so he thought) moan, which of course didn’t go unnoticed by the grinning blonde.

“already that horny? i guess then it’ll be quick” the comment caused blush to appear on the naked boy’s cheeks, suddenly feeling so vulnerable, laying naked on his ex lover’s bed, waiting for him to join. martin took off his shirt and rasmus almost choked on his spit right there. he remembered his body to be fit, the older one liked to exercise, but he certainly didn’t expect a six pack with even more tattoos he had never seen. 

“like what you see? it’s all yours baby boy, but only if you obey me” the swede was enjoying the reactions he got from rasmus, deciding to tease him even further. it was time to change the atmosphere.

“spread your legs for me, i want to see your tiny hole” rasmus was shaking, he didn’t know what to do, the feeling of shyness overcame him and showing his most private place to his ex didn’t look like a great idea.

“m-martin, i’m scared, i can’t do this”

“you can baby boy, i know it, you just have to get used to it, it’s been a long time”

“it wasn’t…” he whispered, hoping the latter didn’t hear it, but as always, he was wrong.

“what did u say? it wasn’t? who was it then? tell me”

“i-i…”

“don’t you think that at least i deserve to know who used to fuck my ex, while i was hurting myself all the time because of our break up?! are u aware how did that fuck me up? it still does rasmus, so much, you have no idea…” the look in martin’s eyes changed, there wasn’t lust anymore, sadness and hurt replaced it, rasmus wanted to cry there, wanting to apologize for hurting him, but he knew he couldn’t, it would just do more damage, an apology after 2 fucking years. instead he told him who was the person that tried to help him move on from martin (but did it really help?)

“it was luka…”

“........”

“martin?”

“i should have expected it”

“what?”

“i saw the way you were looking at each other during all of your content videos. both of you had heart emojis in your eyes”

“i can expla-”

“no need to rasmus, we weren’t together then right? it was your life and choice, you don’t have to explain yourself to me”

“i want to, i owe you something after my leave and our break up…”

“can you dress yourself and leave my room? i don’t feel like talking about it now”

“b-but-”

“please rasmus, just do it” martin’s eyes were full of tears, threatening to fall down any second now. the danish boy was speechless, he hadn’t seen rekkles so devastated in like forever. the thought of comforting him came to his mind, but the matter was really serious if martin said please. rasmus hurriedly put his clothes on and left the room, leaving the both of them even more heartbroken than ever.

_ I miss your tanned skin, your sweet smile. _

_ So good to me, so right. _

_ And how you held me in your arms that September night: _

_ The first time you ever saw me cry. _

the lec spring split was starting today and g2 was playing the opening match against mad lions. everyone was a bit of stressed due to overwhelming pressure from fans, casters and even other teams - they had rekkles, g2 seemed like a superteam to win everything this year. the expectations were high, any small mistake from them could cost them a massive wave of toxicity on social media - they knew it. for the sake of a good match, every single disagreement had to swept under a rug, especially the tension between rekkles and caps. the match was intense, their early game wasn’t the best, but they managed to win. it seemed like nothing bad ever happened outside the game, the boys were happy about the win. rekkles was the first one to be interviewed and it went smoothly, he was glowing all the time, receiving the attention of fans on social media, saying he looks way happier now in g2. after the interview ended, the boys could finally go back to the gaming house and rest, they still had 2 more matches this week, and a 3-0 start would be greatly appreciated. of course only jankos and grabbz had a drivers licence, so it was pretty obvious who was going to take them home. martin really wanted to sit in the front sit to avoid sitting next to rasmus, but as always, things didn’t go as he wished for. miky practically sprinted to the front seat next to jankos, he wanted to sit close to his boyfriend, no matter what. as wunder took the window seat, he knew that caps would be next to him. 

“okay, i can endure it, it’s only a 20 min ride, i don’t have to look at him” martin thought, trying to ignore everything as rasmus sat next to him. 

after a few minutes and making sure they didn’t forget anything, they departed from their office and the ride home began. jankos tried to do everything he could to prevent the ride from being silent, telling some jokes, laughing etc. the rest joined him of course, but both mid laner and adc were awkward with interacting outside the game. it felt like eternity, trying so hard to ignore the smaller boy, however, he just couldn’t help stealing glances at him from time to time, it was a habit at this point. hoping that rasmus hadn’t noticed, again he looked at him, but to his horror, he found rasmus staring back. instead of quickly turning away, he continued to stare into those beautiful eyes, seeing regret in them. since they were next to each other, the distance between them was so small, they could easily kiss right there. it looked like both of them thought about it, because the blush could be visible on rasmus and martin, that still didn’t make them come back to the reality. suddenly martin felt something grab his hand, he looked down and saw another hand, it was rasmus. the touch of his smooth hand sent electricity down martin’s spine, it felt just like the first time they held hands. the nostalgic feeling overwhelmed the boy and his eyes in one second became watery. afraid to look up and show rasmus that he was close to crying, he wanted so badly to tell him how much he had missed him and that even though rasmus departure fucked up both of them pretty hard, he still wanted to try again. he couldn’t live without him, that’s the truth, rasmus was his little hope, keeping him alive all the time. when he wanted to give up, the smaller boy was there for him and vice versa. martin linked their hands together for the rest of ride, no talking, just touching, to show that maybe going through the pain is worth as long as they have each other.

_ It turns out freedom ain't nothing but missing you. _

_ Wishing I'd realized what I had when you were mine. _

_ I'd go back to December, turn around and make it all right. _

_ I go back to December all the time. _

the second and the third match were a huge success for g2, making them secure a 3-0 opening week. the atmosphere changed, even if rekkles and caps still hadn’t figured out their relationship or just talked about it, it was still way more peaceful than it used to be. to summarise week 1, g2 media content team decided to create new series - caps recaps. the first duo to feature in it was of course the ex fnatic members. martin and rasmus still had at least 15 minutes before the recording, they wanted to release the recaps as fast as possible. martin excused himself to the bathroom, quickly followed by the same excuse from rasmus. after finishing his business, martin went to wash his hands, but he could feel an intense stare on his back. knowing who it was, he turned around and smirked.

“i seriously think you enjoy watching my back, is it THAT sexy rasmus?” the latter was surprised, he didn’t expect (as always at this point, smh rasmus) martin to notice, now feeling shy and blushing like crazy, he just couldn’t reply “yes, i do, so what?”, it was too much for him.

“no response, again, did luka even teach you how to be a good boy?”

“w-what?”

“you heard me, did luka even teach you? considering that he was fucking you for 2 years or am i wrong?”

“h-he did…”

“exactly, yet you act like a brat you know? that’s not nice”

“i-i’m sorry…”

“now come here”

rasmus took a few steps before standing in front of the taller man, he still couldn’t look up from the floor, his cheeks burning from the whole situation. they were behaving not how it was supposed to be - two heartbroken ex lovers, running away from their feelings, but giving in to the lust, like 2 years ago.

“look at me rasmus”

“i can’t…”

“you can baby, please”

finally brave enough to look up, martin was looking at him with that look - lust, but also adoration and rasmus knew, martin never stopped caring, even if the danish boy broke his heart. words came out of his mouth before he could even think.

“fuck me martin”

“huh?”

“you heard it, fuck me, destroy me, i deserve it after all, i was the one to hurt you, yet i still can’t do anything about it”

“rasmus, i forgave you a long time ago, it’s fine”

“it’s not fine! why are you so nice to me?! because of me you returned to smoking and most probably drinking, i destroyed you…” these 2 months were especially hard for rasmus, his feelings just kept piling up and now he was finally talking about it, how he should have done when martin wanted to talk. 

“rasmus-”

“i’m sorry, i’m really sorry martin, i fucked up 2 years ago, i couldn’t even tell you or apologize, i just fucking left you, it’s all my fault”

“it’s okay, trust me”

“you are not okay! why do you even care about me? all i ever did was hurting you!” at this point rasmus was just getting annoyed, how could martin say that it was fine, when it obviously wasn’t.

“tell me! why do you care?!”

“rasmus, please calm down-”

“no! not until you tell me!”

“because i fucking love you!” ah shit, that was unexpected, but was it really? he could feel that martin was most probably still in love, but hearing those words again was so surprising, no one had told him them since his last night with martin at fnatic, not even luka.

“y-you love me?”

“of course i do you little brat, never stopped”

“b-but how?”

“relationship is all about ups and downs rasmus, nothing is perfect you know? we were young and dumb, unable to talk about harder things, thinking about the good side only and that’s where we got lost”

“i wanted to tell you about my leave, but i was so afraid”

“i know baby, i figured it out after some time. i admit, i was furious at first, but i couldn’t imagine myself without you, then i heard where were you going and i lost it, my love going to the biggest enemy team, i couldn’t believe it. however, i shouldn’t be the one to talk since i’m also here now”

“w-what about luka? i recall seeing you almost crying when i told you…”

“well, i’m not gonna lie, i was hurt, but we weren’t together then and you had the right to do everything you wanted” the statement was as clear as it could get. 

martin grew up, while rasmus… he was still a kid, how could he deserve such a caring person that was able to bear such a massive amount of pain, yet be the one to fix everything? the calm voice and maturity made him even smaller, feeling not good enough for the other. 

_ "I will never be enough for him"  _ the thought haunted rasmus and he couldn't help the tears escaping from his eyes. at this sight, martin immediately grabbed him and held him close, the tears wetting the g2 jersey, but the swede couldn't care less now.

"rasmus baby, i know what you are thinking, trust me, you are more than enough. everyone makes mistakes and it's perfectly normal to get confused" 

"h-how can you be so perfect" rasmus sniffed, his nose now blocked because of crying

"i'm far from being perfect you know?"

"for me you are perfect"

"fine, if i'm perfect for you, then you have to stop thinking you're not enough for me, okay?"

"o-okay"

"now let's get you cleaned up, we can't let the fans see you like that in the first caps recaps video"

while trying to get rasmus to a normal state that no one could see he was crying, martin dropped a few kisses here and there, his nose, forehead, cheeks and finished by placing a big kiss on his cute lips. the whole action made caps blush, not used to it after a long time, but appreciate the little gestures from his- exactly, his what? 

"martin?"

"yeah?"

"what are we?"

"what do you want us to be rasmus?"

“i-i want to be yours…” the response was quiet that it could be barely heard, thankfully martin had perfect hearing. his smile blossomed like a delicate flower, so pretty and innocent, rasmus could bring out the best from martin and that was a well known fact.

“you will be always mine, my love. i promise you” 

the time seemed to stop right then, only them mattered, looking at each other with love and promises, to never let go again. the pain they had suffered from was worth it, nothing else was as relevant as their love. the journey was a proof that fighting for love is always paying off, being able to be with your significant other for the rest of the life. nothing could compare to this emotion, money and fame were temporary, but love was forever. the kiss was sweet like candy, passionate as ever and contained all the words, but the most important were in their hearts -  _ “i love you”. _

_ Maybe this is wishful thinking, _

_ Probably mindless dreaming, _

_ But if we loved again, I swear I'd love you right. _

thankfully, no one noticed that rasmus had cried briefly before recording caps recaps and also their heavy make out session in the bathroom - well, they had to control themselves, it would be embarrassing to go out with swollen red lips and hairstyles not in the right state. overall, the recording went smoothly, both of the boys laughing all the time, from the fans perspective it seemed like the 3-0 week was the reason, but let’s be honest, there was a lot more to the story. after wrapping up the quick shoot, everyone was let to go home, so that meant one thing - jankos driving, yes, he wasn’t the worst, but the feeling of unsafety never left the boys. as always, the front seat was occupied by mihael, while wunder had to deal with the new (not so new) couple in the backseat, sensing the sexual tension which made him sick. even jankos and miky could sense it, so it was really bad to say the least.

“for fuck’s sake, can you guys stop fucking each other with your eyes next to us?” the top laner couldn’t handle it anymore “we get it, you are back together, happy and horny blablabla, but can you keep it down until we arrive?”

“wait what? how do you know we got back together?” rasmus was shocked, they wanted to tell them at home, but turns out they didn’t need to anymore.

“oh please, during the recording we could easily see what must had happened in the bathroom, you were so giggly all of a sudden after the tense atmosphere that was lasting for like 4 weeks” wunder concluded, making martin and rasmus amazed at his observation skills, damn he was good.

“oh! and also when you were about to start recording i saw a hickey on your collarbone rasmus, you guys are spicy, aren’t you?” jankos wiggled his eyebrows so that the couple could see it in the driving mirror, making them red instantly, while the rest of g2 laughed at the jungler’s remark.

“what hickey? what are you talking about?” rasmus was red as tomato and confused, he didn’t have a hickey, unless- “MARTIN!” 

“yes babe?” it seemed like he had cooled down faster than rasmus and now was smirking in his direction.

“oh my god, please stop already, solve your shit in the gaming house” wunder whined, feeling exhausted from hearing all this, he only wanted to relax and play wow. finally, everyone shut up and the car was filled with silence, just like he had wished for.

immediately after entering the gaming house, rekkles took caps by his arm and literally dragged him to swede’s bedroom, instantly locking the door after them. both of them fell on the big bed and layed there, martin holding rasmus close to him, afraid to let go.

“i still can’t believe that we’re back together, that’s actually crazy rasmus, no?” the bright smile on his handsome face said everything, oh, how rasmus had missed that.

“is it? maybe it was meant to be you know”

“yeah, we got another chance, but this time we’re older, more mature and for sure we won’t waste it, i promise you babe” martin kissed his nose and held him tighter.

“i promise you too, i’m so happy to be with you, those 2 years were tough and i tried to cope with that, not really in a healthy way, getting into fwb with luka, trying some alcohol, i swear i was sinking, nothing helped me. i still don’t feel like i used to and i never will, but with you it can be less painful”

“rasmus, you are the most beautiful human i have ever met, no one can compare to you. i also tried to forget by sleeping with other people, i returned to smoking, yet i knew nothing could help” rasmus sadly chuckled, one decision left them broken for the rest of their lives, yes, they will heal together now, but nothing will be the same. 

“i love you martin”

“i love you too, rasmus”

and with that, they fell asleep in each other's arms, finally feeling loved again.

_ I go back to December all the time. _

_ All the time. _


End file.
